I Solemnly Swear Things WILL Be Different

As a first time mom, I was a bit neurotic.

Up 25x a night putting my finger under his nose to make sure he was still breathing.
Refused to give him formula for almost 6 months even though I wasn’t making enough milk for him. (hindsight is 20 x20)
Carried a diaper bag that weighed 45 pounds cause I had to have everything….just incase.
I warmed his bottles, therefore creating a temperature snob. Not warm, not eating.

Photo by Brittany Davis Photography

I was literally a wreck for the first 6 months of LJ’s life. Beyond sleep deprived, spent 80% of the day with half a shirt on, and barely got out of the house.

So now, while my mind is still semi-clear and only partially hormone crazy, I’m promising my future self that things WILL be different.

If necessary, this child will get formula at night given by Daddy.
I will not get up every time I hear the baby cry and Hubs is up….he’s got it. 
No warming bottles. Room temperature or even cold. I’m not warming water bottles on my dashboard.
This child will sleep in his/her own room from day 1. I’ll get a video monitor, but no fingers under the nose/hand on chest during the night.

I know that many of the crazy things I did are common for first time moms. You have to learn somehow. But this time, I refuse to be a walking zombie, angry at the world, hating life for the first 6 months. I will learn, I will do things differently.

Future me, read this. Stick to it. Go back to bed!! 

What have you done with your kids in the past that you swear you will never do again?

Pin It


  1. Um, I still occasionally put my hand on his chest if he seems a little too still and he’s 11. so I got nothing. :)

  2. Let’s see. Baby #1 slept with us so I could nurse him and still sleep. That led to him sleeping in the same room with us until he was, um, 4. Yeah, that’s right 4.

    Then there was baby #2. I let her keep her pacifier until she was 4. This one was no big deal to me whatsoever. I kept mine until I was 6.

    Baby #3. I slept in his room until he was about 3 months old. He made so many noises all night long. Grunting, wiggling, sighing heavily as if he had worked all day long. Ha! So, I stayed in his room so I could get up at every.single.noise. And I did. For 3 months. Until I lost my mind. Or perhaps I regained it and got back in my own bed.

    For all of them we carried our own high chair seat to restaurants because you never know what’s on a restaurant high chair. (wink). And we still carry antibacterial wipes to wipe down every table, chair, cart, etc. wherever we go. And now the kids are 10, 6 and 4. Oh well.

    I do wish I had rested more and cleaned less. Enjoyed more and worried less. Laughed more and fretted less. And by baby #3 I did…and I loved every minute of it. I actually began to look forward to 4 a.m. feedings so I could hang with the little man and catch up on Dawson’s Creek. It was my private, personal time with him that no one else got to have. Loved that.

    Blessings to you and yours. You’ll do better than fine…you’ll do great with baby #2.

  3. Some of those things you still wind up doing! :)

    With my oldest. He slept in the bed with us until he was 6 months old – which led to him still getting up in the middle of the night to eat. It wasn’t until we put him in a crib that he started sleeping through the night. I also always made sure he was breathing with the whole hand on the chest thing. Lol. So with my youngest he slept in his bed from the get go but I still did the hand on the chest to make sure he was breathing. I can’t help myself! You’ll do fine with baby #2!

  4. Kara says:

    One thing I’ll do differently is to use a lactation consultant. Because my mom had a breeze with breast feeding and the fact that I was one of the first of my friends to have a baby, I didn’t know that breast feeding could be painful and frustrating and depressing. I struggled for almost a month and gave up and I was filled with guilt for the next 11 months. I WILL NOT DO THAT AGAIN. And if breast feeding doesn’t work with the next baby I won’t allow myself to get depressed about it. Or at least I’ll try not to.

    Good luck with your pregnancy! I can hardly wait for your fashion posts! :)

  5. Katie says:

    My husband works crazy hours as a rancher/farmer. So I would make my oldest son something fast and convenient for supper at a reasonable hour. Chicken nuggets and hotdogs at 6:00. Then my husband and I would sit down to dinner at 8:30 or 9:00, whenever he got home. Now my son is a terribly picky eater. I hate that I did that. Now, I make dinner at the same time every night and my kids and I eat and when the hubby gets home I will sit at the table and chat with him while he eats. Carter is still a very picky eater – this one will take a long time to work out.

  6. Whitney says:

    Amen!!!! 100 amens!!! This time around has to be different, but the baby blues hit me pretty hard and I’m afraid it’s going to happen again. I know some women struggle far more than I did. But I was just like you: most of the day in pajamas and hardly went anywhere.

  7. Sarah B says:

    I could almost feel your exhaustion through the post! So wonderful to have the 2nd baby because now you know what to do and not! You will be great!

  8. Nancy says:

    *If* there is a second time around I will :
    1- I will PLAN BETTER on when I get pregnant so my baby is born in late Jan or Feb (no December baby for me the 2nd time around!)
    2- Plan to have an in-home delivery if possible so won’t be stuck in a hospital room with a neighbour who received at least 200 people visiting for the 4 days we where there… my husband and I got NO rest (or privacy) before going home!
    3- Hold strong anyone (including hospital lactation consultant) if they try to force breast feeding – MY choice will be to do it for 3 hours, then the baby IS getting formula since I CAN NOT produce milk due to an operation when I was a teen and my 1st baby got jaundice due to not getting enough fluids in the first 24 hours.
    4- I WILL have my hospital bag packed and IN THE CAR 1 month before my due date – in case we end up there.
    5- I will let my child play more independently

  9. Candice says:

    I took care of both my children close to the same way as babies! I was super exhausted with my first born those first months but that was my self’s fault for waking up at every slight movement, change in breathing, sound that she made. I’d have her in my arms in the middle of the night before she even woke up. I was more relaxed with my son and that helped me get some better sleep and all is well!

Speak Your Mind